Sunday 30 September, 2007

Time is never ripe for a suicide


Do you think you have lost the will to live? Well you are not alone. When people are bogged down by problems in life they think of the other alternative “DEATH” Most of them struggle through their problems and succeed in finding a solution while some others don’t. There lies the marked difference.


IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM AND ARE THINKING SUICIDE!!
HOLD IT! THERE IS A SOLUTION.


Around 2000 people in Bangalore commit suicide every year and about 95% of these are teenagers. It is a pity that we are often left alone during the most confused phase of our lives and I cant help thinking that if there were someone to help, so many of these lives could be saved.

I have been researching why teenagers take this extreme step and here are a few factors and perhaps a way out.

1) Loneliness:
We seldom find people who are like us, and if we do we are extremely lucky. So there is nothing wrong in being lonely. Keep an open mind and be yourself, you are bound to find someone soon. In the meanwhile read some books, identify your talents and develop them. Keep yourself busy.


2) Feeling Unwanted:
I have come across a lot of teenagers who complain that they are not wanted by anybody and nobody would miss them if they die. So what? Have an aim in life; show them your worth.


3) Facing Humiliation:
Of the things that bother the adolescents, humiliation is one of the worst. Be it ragging or being teased in school, it is indeed difficult to face. However there is one mantra” Believe in yourself, because if you don’t nobody else will”.


4) Combat Fear:
Do you freak out during exams?
Be superstitious. Identify a lucky dress and tell yourself that while I am wearing it nothing can go wrong.
Go offer flowers to your favorite god and tell yourself it is
your lucky day.
Listen to a good song on radio and think that this song will really make my day.
These are just “bahanas”. After sometime you won’t need any of these excuses to have a lucky day.
Don’t believe me? Try it.


5) Love Failure:
Believe it or not this is one of the main reasons why people loose their lives. There are two main reasons for a relationship to fail.
Possessiveness and Ego. If you have lost your love think back and see if you have made these mistakes. Some people say that possessiveness is a sign of love, but that’s not true. After sometime it becomes a pain for the other person. Ego spoils all kinds of relationships. Love means surrender and there is no place for ego there. Keep these in check
Ego is not your problem? Your love doesn’t reciprocate?
Big Deal! The opposite party looses. As for you? You have got most the amazing experience of your life. Move on.


6) Don’t let those negative thoughts get on to you:
Attitude is a small thing that makes a big difference.
Don’t let your worries burn you. Keep things light, laugh a lot and keep telling yourself everything happens for my own good.
That’s a small tonic for confidence.


7) Physical or sexual abuse:
It is a bad, sad world. I don’t know what to say except whatever the reason it’s not worth your life.

Here are some pointers I could think of. Every body has teenage troubles. None are spared. I guess that is the reason I am tagging Sudhir, Sourav, Daisy, Aditi, Nasia and anybody who thinks they have experiences worth sharing.
.
Who knows? Somebody, someday, somewhere may read these articles and conclude that “time is never ripe for suicide”.


16 comments:

Nasia said...

awesome article.. [:)]..
As for the tag.. hmm i cannot write ab my experiences in my blog.. Strange?? :).. bt tahts true.. other than few farce ones..
too many family members read it.. can u open up a guest blog here.

Anonymous said...

Thanks Nasia..too bad you dont write about your experiences in ur blog ;)..No pronlem...i will try opening a guest blog and will keep you informed :)

Sourav said...

Hey nice topic to bring up...but suddenly little surprised to see this one from u...u i felt will be the last person to think about these things...neways cant write about my own experience(do u think i will have one) but ya it provoked my intereset in the topic and will try to post in my blog something in my way :)

Sudhir - Nanhi Si Jaan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sudhir - Nanhi Si Jaan said...

Hi Brinzy,
Article is ok, it covers the topic though not throughly, atleast superficially.
I liked the 4th point though...
the article lacks depth, genuinity and is one of the rare articles where I missed the Quality factor of yours about which I boast of.
The complexity of the human mind while commiting a suicide has been ignored.
If one fine day I think of commiting suicide this article of yours, the way it has been put, will not help me to change my mind.
I will give you 2/5 points for this and expect some deep rooted analysis on this topic which indeed is becoming prevalent in society.

Anonymous said...

Hi sudhir,

I appreciate that you have taken so much time for the analysis of my article.

Well as for the quality factor, i have deliberately used simple language and have tried to keep the tone of the passage carefully light and carefree. I have taken a totally opposite tone (chilled attitude) as opposed to the mindset of the person committing suicide which is emotional confusion.

I definitely didnt intend to cover the complexity of a human mind as i would have to write a book rather than an article to cover it. :-).

The whole passage revolves around a central theme "chill out, you are not alone in your problems".
and thats my main message in the passage as well.

However, different people have different perspectives and are influenced by varied factors. You are welcome to think differently and that is precisely the reason i have tagged others.

I am hoping to achieve the desired effect collectively, rather than with my own article. And i am confident that if all of us put our thoughts together, we will be able to help someone out there.

Sudhir - Nanhi Si Jaan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sudhir - Nanhi Si Jaan said...

Hi,
Quality is not dependent on the use of complicated lang i guess ....:)
about your topic and human mind involvement factor i think we are on diff page...!
Sorry but i couldnt get that central "chill" theme of yours in the passage save 4th point...
abt perspective I agree everybody has diff one and I have mine too but that does not mean I do not respect yours..!
njoi n ve fun :)
$Mishra

********** said...

Hey Nice Blog....how u got this idea...suicide karne ka plan to nahi aaya na??

Sandy the sailor said...

A gr8 jOb DeAr,
I remeber the article of chetan Bhagat(author of 5Point Someone) that sometimes people used to take a very hard decision about life, and he gave an example of the dog in his street,which looked very depressed and ignored and assaulted by the society,but the main thing it cared for was the meal, and when that dog gets the meal it is satisfied. Same way I think there is no reason to live but if we find the reasons there are a lot of reasons to live. I remember the saying....
Rehne de asmaan , Zameen ki talash kar,
sab kuchh yahin hia, na kahin aur talash kar,
Har arzoo poori ho to jeene ka kya maza,
Jine ke liye bas Ek wajah ki talash kar

So i think people must search for the reason, then he/she will find the life to be lived..
Really a v good article.
A bunch of appreciation form my side.
Enjoy

Unknown said...

Hi Brinzy,
Nice topic! In my opinion, its easy to say don't bother, get over it.Does anyone honestly think physical/sexual abuse experiences are that simple to get over??!! Life throws a lot of incidents of such magnitude. Given our conservative society, one cannot even speak about such things and it is pushed under the rug.The only solution is to encourage teenagers /adults to meet with psychiatrists/ psychologists on a routine basis to get over such thoughts.

Good effort,brinzy.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Aditi Bhagwat said...

If the world had answers to all its problems it would be paradise in no time! Suicide, the extreme step to depression is an escape route. Nothing on earth can justify you to take your life though. Its as much as a crime than killing someone else.

I guess pangs of sadness,loneliness and low self esteem are all part of growing up. We have to got through these things to come out stronger and see how beautiful the world is. And sometimes these negative feelings help us. They are like a catalyst for us to face the world.

Something that has really helped me - is it look at the world around. Really become aware of the different happenings in the world. When we see the progress, the pain, the sorrow and the joy of others we really think beyond ourselves. Identify a cause bigger than yourself to realise how small we are in this universe.

Easier said than i done i guess :) But we have to take a first step somewhere...

Anonymous said...

A great article. really gives some hopes people who feel there is nothing left to lead life.
Good job

Unknown said...

I was looking for few kannada Kavanas i found yours with english translation. Out of curiosity I started looking at your other blogs. Artist "KALAVIDA" has that third dimensional thoughts which most of others lack. But they live in their own world, thats the biggest reason they fail to solve any problem of real life.

Reasons could be true, but the solutions are not. Thinking the problem doesnt exist really doesnt solve the problem...

Trying to think about suicide is different from feeling like commint suicide. Try to speak to one such teenager who has tried to finish his life, probably u will feel like changing ur blog...

Vishwanath.N said...

Who would control the human mind that's so powerful , it's the deadliest weapon and no motivation & reading can ever stop someone from commiting suicide. It's just an opinion.